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When it rains, it pours

Last Saturday started the most ridiculously stupid and frustrating week I think I have ever had. I am sharing in the hopes that it makes at least one person laugh. Looking back I can crack up but in the moment I wanted to kill someone.

Kayla was out and about for Mardi Gras and texted me that she lost her atm card and asked me to call and cancel it. So I called the number on the back of my card. I was told that even though I was on her account, I could not cancel it that she ould have to call. However, I was allowed to place it on hold until she could call.

The next day was the ice storm and for some stupid reason I thought it would be a great idea to walk to get coffee instead of driving. On my way back I stepped onto a patch of ice and my feet went out from underneath me. I first hit my butt and then cracked my head on concrete without breaking my fall. That was probably a good thing because I probably would have broken my arm. I never developed any signs of a head injury except for a big knot on the back of my head so I survived that. Kayla also learned that someone had found her debit card, looked her up on Facebook and called her place of employment and told them they would be returning it to the credit union.

On Monday the credit union called her and said someone had returned it and it would be in the vault. So on Tuesday I head up there only to be told since it was placed on hold, they destroyed it and I would have to get her a new one. I got called into work at the moment so saved that for another day.

On Wednesday I am finishing up work and Brian texts to tell me our new credit card had been denied. I had just signed up for it and received it because they were offering 60000 airline miles if you charged three thousand dollars in three months. Since we are starting home remodeling I knew this would not be a problem. I also use credit cards like cash and pay them off every single month. There is no way I am paying interest or late payment charges. That is a total waste of money. So all of my cards have some kind of cash back offer and they all lose money on me the money nazi. So I come home from work and call the credit card company to find out why the charges were denied. The first thing I am told is that she has to verify my identity which is fine with me. Until she wants to verify my phone number. I just changed my number about five weeks ago and I forgot when I signed up with this card, I actually used Emily’s number because it wouldn’t let me use my new number. So she has me give her another card to verify my identity but when she calls back she tells me the phone number doesn’t match. I say of course it doesn’t because its my old number. I become so frustrated I yell at her that why can’t I give her my social security number or a first-born child. She tells me not to shout at her (I hear God whisper soft at that exact moment) so I apologize. So she then asks me if Emily is near by so she can call her. I say no my kid is in California and briefly explained the entire phone story to her. Finally she decides she can call my husbands number to verify my identity. I am assuming because he is on the account as well. So after thirty minutes all is right with the credit card and we are back in business.

Thursday I went to the credit union and got Kayla a new card. That was super easy for a change. I also mailed Emily her contacts and glasses and put a thousand dollars worth of insurance on them because of the issue I had with her books. On Saturday I would realize I recycled the tracking receipt but luckily they arrived with no issues. I had also put her airline credit card in the package as well. This is how we are flying to Disney in October.

On Friday I get on-line to look at my Costco credit card and I notice I have a charge from amazon for prime movies. I was like what I have prime and I am not paying for some movie subscription. So I get on the phone with amazon and she has to confirm my identity as well. It wasn’t quite as complicated as last time but I had quite a good time telling her my stories. She was cracking up. We finally figure out it is a kindle book that was coded wrong. As I am getting ready to leave work Kayla texts me that she has now lost my credit card that she carries in case of an emergency. This one all the free money goes to college expenses. I have had it the longest of all. So I get home from work and cancel it. Then about two hours later she texts me that she found it but I informed her it was too late, I had already canceled it.

On Saturday I get back on Costco to check my balance (yes I have issues with checking all my credit cards and checking accounts) and a note pops up saying there is potentional fraud on Brian’s card. Sure enough there are double charges so I have to close that card as well. At least i could do that on line without speaking to anyone or having to confirm my idenity.

 

Mole Moral ~ I will not change my phone number ever again. Even it I can have six free iphones, a permanent cook and housekeeper!

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Spoofing

 

For the third time since I got my new phone number I got a call from a 277 number. My first three digits are also 277 so I figured it was one of those spoofer numbers to trick me into a telemarketer call. They never left a message until today. Of course I only set my voicemail up a few days ago so it was impossible to leave me a message. Well today this number left a message.
I listened to the message and was shocked to hear a man’s voice say I don’t know who you are Rachel but if you don’t know me stop calling this number. I was like umm what? So I check my call log and I have never dialed that number. So I did what any stalker crazy person would do, took a screen shot of my call log and sent them a text saying they are calling me I have never called them. Within minutes my phone rings again.
I answered to a lady demanding to know who I am and if I was a person or a business. I was nice and told her this was my new cell phone number. She then proceeds to bawl me out for calling her. I tell her again that I have never called her. She told me I better figure out what the issue is and hinted she would file a complaint. So again I did what any crazy stalker person would do, I called my cell phone provider.
Apparently someone has stolen my phone number to use as a spoof number and calling all the 277 numbers. I asked if I could get in trouble. She said nope there is no record of my number calling the other 277 number so nothing I can be in trouble for. She said they only use the number for about two weeks. So I had a choice I could call this lady back and explain spoofing to her or do nothing.
I chose to do nothing. She was beyond rude. When I see a number I do not recognize I don’t answer it. If they don’t leave a message I know it’s no one I want to speak too. I am not one to call back and say this number just called me, who are you and what do you want. I just honestly don’t care enough to waste that amount of time. Apparently other people have nothing else better to do with their time. Had this lady been nice I would have given her my time but since she was not, I hope my number calls her every day for the rest of the month!

Mole moral ~ Leave it to a mole to have their number be a spoofer number when the Moles all know about spoofing and not to answer numbers that are close to theirs.

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One Word

It was sometime around November 2015 when Emily the Director of Women’s Services asked us to read a book called One Word in preparation for 2016. I always did every single reading assignment in college so of course I read this book. Basically instead of making a bunch of New Years Resolutions that are often forgotten or broken within the first month, you choose one word to focus on for the year. She gave all of women’s services (women’s health, mother/baby, antepartum, labor and birth, perinatal center, birthing center, and education) the task of choosing one word to focus on in 2017. The word we chose was Dedication and each month we had something different to remind us. This involved me and the crafty side for a few of the months and I really enjoyed it. This year women’s services is focusing on Teamwork and I am pretty excited for February’s reminder because it involves the winter Olympics.

Last year I chose a word for myself but three weeks in the headache started and I thought of it off and on but it kind of fell by the way side. I decided this word would be my word for this year and I would blog about it to hold myself accountable. So the word that came to mind was SOFT. There are two parts to this and the first is the more excited, annoyed, nervous I get the louder I become. I can find myself almost shouting at times and most of the time it is not necessary. The second half of my language and my cursing. It is such a bad habit that I need to break. It goes hand in hand with the excitement, annoyed, and nervous and being loud. The more worked up I get the more each of them get out of control.

I have been thinking about writing this blog for two weeks and when I came home from church and logged into Facebook I found a website asking what’s your word so I ordered this

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It came the last week so now it is time to take it out of the package and get busy not yelling and cursing.

 

Mole Moral~When you already exercise by being obsessed with running you have to get creative with New Years Resolutions.

 

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Peter and Andrew

Today in church Pastor Herc gave a run down on the twelve disciples and their personalities. He was making the point that Jesus didn’t pick his team based on the strongest, best traits and abilities like we humans do. Just think back to school days when teams were picked for gym. The least athletic were always chosen last and I was one of them. This was one of the best talks in a long time so I paid close attention to figure out which guy I was most like and it ended up in a tie.

Peter whose name was originally Simon has a lot of my traits. He tended to shoot of his mouth and say things without really thinking. The biggest was saying he would never deny Jesus and yet he did not only once but three times in the same night. It reminds me of the time I said to a patient, I would rather be dead than him. He had lost all four extremities to meningitis. Luckily, he forgave me for about the most insensitive comment I ever made and has gone on to do great things.

I did not realize Andrew was Simon Peters brother and often referred to that way. So no matter what he did he was always over shadowed by his brothers greatness. How annoying that must have been. I often feel this way about my work. I am the invisible nurse. I do a great job but no one seems to remember and rarely am I ever mentioned by name. I know a big part of this is because I take people right after they have surgery when they are still under anesthesia. I am ok with this most of the time but every once in a while when I see the girls with four and five daisy awards or mentioned over and over in patient rounding I get a little jealous and annoyed. I do try to remember what Jesus said in Matthew 6:1-4

“Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven. “So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

 

Mole Moral ~ It’s much better to be Peter and Andrew than Judas of Iscariot!

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Christmas Angel

It was back in 2004 and I was at church when Pastor Tom spoke about a thing he did called Christmas Angel. For the 12 nights before Christmas you pick someone who may be struggling, had a bad year or just need a lift at Christmas and drop off presents. The first night you leave one of something, and the second night two, and the third night three etc. But there is a catch, you drop the present, ring the doorbell, run, and try not to get caught. Of course if you have your children help, they can do the ringing and running and you drive the getaway car. He had this done to him by a mormon family who never revealed who they were. He said we shouldn’t tell either but if someone did that for me and never said who it was, it would bother me forever. So on day twelve I always left a note revealing who I was. Although he said this was a way to bless others, over the years it has been a big blessing to our family.

The person or people I have chosen were always picked by God. He put their name on my heart at some point during the year. Some years it’s really early like April or May and sometimes its been as late as October. Now God doesn’t talk to me in an audible voice for that would surely make me a crazy person but I just get the feeling this person is the one. Most of the time it is a patient I have cared for, but sometimes its a friend that doesn’t know this secret about me. This year I received a little push back from who I chose, to the point I started questioning myself (and God). But in true God fashion I got the answer loud and clear on day ten of dropping gifts off. I received a note saying this girl had a bad year and every night she had to have painful dressing changes and knowing she would be receiving a gift made the discomfort less. I started crying when I read the note. After all it is the exact reason we have done this every year since 2004.

This is the first Christmas we had without Emily. She is working out in California and ended up spending Christmas with the Lindsay’s. If she had to not be at home, she was at the second best place in the world. After all had Brian and I both kicked the bucket, our kids were willed to them. There were times they threatened to kill us so they could live with them. Emily was very sad that she didn’t get to Christmas angel with us. Allyson said to me she liked houses that were farther away because we had more time to talk. So I started thinking about some of the highlights and I shared some of them with this years girl. I decided to blog them tonight for my girls.

The very first year I worked evenings so I had to drop the gifts off during the day. Since I worked the first three days I dropped them off during the day. Apparently that person worked during the day so finally on day three I made my sister call from her work and say this is your Christmas angel please check your front porch. The next year we did my neighbors I had as a child. She was convinced it was a neighbor down the street and each night would yell thank you and say the lady’s name. She never once thought it was me. One year the family lived in De Soto. We arrive in the dark and not one single mailbox has the address on it. None of the houses do either. I attempt to get on google earth but the houses are blocked by trees. By this time I am freaking out, screaming and cursing when the husband walks out to check the mail. Last year the guy I did was convinced he had a stalker and almost called the cops on us. He also had no numbers on his house so my oldest went rooting through his mailbox (which was attached to the house) to see what address was on the mail. One year we did Allyson’s friends who are twins. The first night she was at their house so I had to deliver by myself. I knocked on the door so loud that the guy across the hall opened his door also. I scared them all so bad they bumped heads on the table they were under. Before I had a smart phone I had to use map quest. I arrive to the street I was supposed to turn on and it had turned into a QT with no way to get through. I had to call Brian who had to get out his street guide to get us to the correct house. One year we pulled up to the house and Kayla says they are in the garage. I say no they are not, deliver the gift. She gets out starts to walk and I hear them in the garage. I say F**k they are in the garage, get back in the car.

This year was no different. The very first night I had worked and went by myself. There were no numbers on this house so I had to walk up to the neighbors to see their numbers. I ring the doorbell, hit the second step and my ankle goes sideways. I almost fell and I said oh hell no, I am not getting caught on day one and made it down the steps. One day just as I was getting out of the car, they came out of the house to go somewhere. I jumped back in the car and hid till they left. Then became paranoid they would forget something and come back and catch me. On the eleventh night just as Allyson was crossing the street a van pulled up into their driveway so she came back to the car. We did a lap around the subdivision and then she delivered. But the thing we will always remember is the stop sign in the middle of a street with houses on each side of the road. No cross-road or anything. The sidewalks are on both sides of the streets as well so we couldn’t figure out the purpose. On the last day I was actually going to ring the bell and wait (I’ve only done this one time in all these years) but they were not home.

So what started out as a way to bless others has turned into a Christmas tradition that we all love and look forward to each year. We’ve had great family talks and great family yelling. We’ve brightened 19 families over the years and hope to do 19 more. Although sooner than I care to admit, it will be me by myself so I better keep on running so I don’t get caught.

 

Mole Moral ~ Ding dong ditch still seems wrong even when leaving fun little presents.

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A Mole Christmas Tradition

Everyone always mentions family Christmas traditions and my mind always go blank. But this year, one jumped out and smacked me in the head.
Every year I give each of my girls a Christmas ornament so that when they move out they will have enough for a tree. I try to make them something that is relevant to the year. When Emily was in seventh grade she took drama and was in The King and I. She was twin number one. So that year I bought her this ornament.
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Now this ornament plays Shall We Dance so after its put on the tree someone pushes it and we all dance around the living room. This year I put the ornaments up when I was home alone. However I pushed the button and danced around the living room. Allyson came  home from work and saw I had put the ornaments up and looked right where I always place it and pushed the button. She, the dog and I then proceeded to dance around the room. Later that evening Brian returned from the property and he pushed it and we danced again. Kayla is due home from college and we shall see if she pushes it too. Since Emily will be out in California I think we may have to face time her so we can all dance.
Last week Allyson saw that The King and I was playing at the Fox Theater and asked if we could go. I told her if I can get tickets, it’s game on. So we went to the Sunday afternoon show. When I was a sophomore in high school we put on that play. I was in the orchestra and thought for sure I remembered the entire thing.  Nope I only remembered the shall we dance scene, the ending and the ballet scene. I’m pretty sure Kevin Olsen that played Simon of Legree had crazy long fingernails for the part. I ran into him at Mercy many years ago and he was a respiratory therapist. After we got home I got out my yearbook to see who was in the play. My memory was terrible and I’m glad I kept my yearbook all these years. I will never forget B.J. Bock who played the King did not have his lines memorized until the night before. I thought the drama teacher was going to lose his mind. Somehow he pulled it all together and it went smoothly live. I had totally forgotten Eddie Skaggs was in it which is probably how my crush on him developed. I do remember the girl who played Anna had an after play party and I went with my friends Tim and Kathy who also were in the orchestra with me. There was probably alcohol there but I was such a goodie two shoes I would have never drank.

The production was great and since I barely remembered anything about it, it was like seeing something brand new. Allyson had never been to the Fox so she enjoyed looking at how it was decorated. The program book had a lot of information about it and she found that very interesting. Especially how many lightbulbs were in the chandelier. We both agreed we would not want to be the one responsible for changing the burned out ones.

Mole Moral ~ Family Christmas traditions are cool, no matter how crazy they seem. I must go push the button!

 

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Confess it, don’t stress it

My mom gave Emily real pearls for obtaining her doctorate in physical therapy this past May. When Emily was little she would put on all of my moms necklaces and play dress up. When Emily joined a sorority her big sister bought her a string of not real pearls. (fake just sounds super cheap) and Emily wore them a lot in college. Always makes me think of June Cleaver from Leave it to Beaver fame. Because Emily had decided to do traveling Physical Therapy she left behind her pearls for me to put in the safe deposit box to keep them from getting lost or stolen. The box they came in sat on the ironing board for two months before I decided I would take them to the safety deposit box. This was around the end of August. I must confess I hate cleaning and swear on my death-bed I will not say I wish I kept my house cleaner. So I opened the box and they were not in there. I figured they were around the living room somewhere and I would find them eventually.

It is now December and I still have not found them. Emily has finally recovered from her fourth kidney stone and her first surgery to have one removed. So I bite the bullet last night and call her and tell her I cannot find them anywhere. She says you put them in the safe deposit box. I said no I did not and I just took everything out of it and brought it home to organize it. So she says they are in the special bag to keep them in and to look in her room on the computer desk. So I wander down there while I am talking to her and sure enough right there they sit. Now I had looked on and in the computer desk at least three times in the past trying to find the stupid things and yet now they are right there waving a flag that says hi you blind old lady.

Emily found the entire thing  hilarious. Especially that I had been worrying for months that I had lost them and would have to try to secretly replace them. Except I couldn’t even do that because it wouldn’t be the ones my mom bought her. I should have just called her straight away and asked her instead of being my own worst enemy. As many times as I have lost my debit card and my credit card, I am not sure why she would entrust me not to lose her pears.

 

Mole Moral ~ The real question is; will the pearls make it to the safe deposit box before I misplace them again?