Last week on my Time Hop app it reminded me of the time I was texting while running and hit a chunk of concrete and fell and scrapped up my face. I remember exactly who I was texting and what we were talking about. You would have thought I would have taken that as a warning or foreshadowing but I saw it as neither.
Yesterday I was walking to church for the baptism service and texting with my sister. I stepped into this hole in our street and down I went.
My ankle rolled and I slammed it into the concrete. I managed to hit both legs right below the knees and they are bruised. I landed on my left wrist again and aggravated the sprain and bruised it. The entire 19 weeks of training flashed before my eyes in a flash. I got up and could walk so being my true crazy self walked to church.
I started to walk home after the edge which was after the baptism when Brian texted me and asked if I needed a ride. I actually said yes and he came and picked me up. He asked if he should cancel vacation and the hotels. I told him absolutely not.
After I was home and no longer distracted I noticed my left ankle was swelling and really hurting to touch it. I then went into full freak out Freddy mode. Emily called during this time and told me to calm down. That who was I kidding, I would run it on a broken ankle. Sadly, she’s right. I’d load up on pain killers and run and deal with the aftermath later. However I’m pretty sure it isn’t broken. It hurts way more to touch my ankle (like a bad bruise) than to walk. However I think it will be wise to not do my last three training runs and just rest it.
Mole moral ~ When you are a high fall risk you should not text and walk, it’s more dangerous than texting and driving.
For anyone that has formally trained for a race, they know what taper means. Taper usually occurs a couple of weeks before the race and where the amount of miles dramatically decreases. My training for the fifty mile had three weeks of taper and it came in the nick of time, as I was about ready to throw in the towel and say forget the race.
I left for camp on a Saturday at midnight. That friday I ran 28 miles at the indoor track. It took me almost seven hours and something like 330 laps. Around mile 18 I hit the I’m going to die of boredom wall and by mile 26 I seriously wanted to off myself. The next day I was back for another 12 miles. It was so mentally challenging I am not sure how I did it. Sunday I was on the bus until six in the evening. Monday I got up and ran 12 miles, Tuesday 6 and Wednesday 4. That was 62 miles in six days with camp factored in. I saw 55 kids and was woken up at least twice in the middle of the night that week. It is no wonder I had a headache the entire way home on Friday. I blew off my second 28 mile run that saturday because I was exhausted and cut Sunday’s in half. I think I forgot I’m twice as old as twenty-five and may have over did it just a bit. The next week every run was a nightmare, I had to force myself out the door.
This week was much better. I had a six-mile and a four mile during the week and that was it. It was during this time Brian had gotten on the race website and found the course had finally been posted. I discovered that there would be stops every five miles with food, drinks and bathrooms. I had previously thought it would be every ten miles. Also every stop was accessible by vehicle with driving directions so Brian was nominated as my crew person. He seems to be taking it very seriously. I was pretty excited to think I would get to see him every five miles and not have to carry a million things with me. He can bring me drinks and food and anything else I need. Yesterday I got an email from the race with details of what to expect. Sometime in the next couple of days I will know what my bib number is. That was super exciting.
Today was the first ten-mile run I have done in I don’t know how long that I didn’t want to stay in bed. The weather was gorgeous and I didn’t even start until eight. I ran faster than I have in a long time and I’m telling you it’s because of taper. The body needs the rest so it can gear up for the big run. I actually was envisioning myself crossing the finish line and having pictures taken. I’m starting to get just a little excited for next Saturday. This weeks runs are a 4, 3, and then a 2 mile run. It is the only time the entire 20 weeks that I have had a run less than 4 miles. I won’t know what to do with only two miles. But the key is not to go running more and stick to the schedule. This will not be an issue for me! I am looking forward to my mileage being so much less, this has felt like a full-time job and everyone knows I am part-time girl.
Mole Moral ~ Rest, it does a body good!
I’ve been home for over a week and tonight was the first night for the Edge (our youth service). I cut off my arm band from camp a little while ago. This year we were yellow so I had a couple of people ask me at work if I was a high fall risk. (Patients that are high fall risk wear yellow armbands). I hadn’t even thought about it until I was asked and that cracked me up. The messages were great and the theme was awesome. I am reposting the take away sentence from each message which i copied from BigStuf.
>>if you can SEE different, you can BE different.>>
>>what if we saw THEM through HIM?>>
>>the best things in life require a fight>>
>>based on where I’ve been, and where I’m going, what’s the wise thing to do?>>
>>what do you think about when you think about God? Jesus reveals God as a father.>>
>>if they don’t bring out the best IN you, they’re not the best FOR you.>>
>>your life is saying something about Him.>>
The nursing side of camp was insanity. I decided this year to keep a record of how many kids came through my room. I am sure I forgot a few so I’m estimating somewhere around 55. Most of it was easy stuff, I need a band-aid, I have a headache but some of it was a lot more. The first night of camp I was awoken at two in the morning for an assessment and that should have been my clue to go straight to the airport and fly home. Totally kidding but it was a foreshadowing of the busiest camp to date. Three kids tested positive for strep throat and another kid broke his arm. I missed session six with a medical emergency. Because of HIPAA I can’t really be specific but every nurse friend was blown away that I did not rush him to the ER. However, because of my ten years of burn/icu experience I was comfortable taking care of it the way we handled it. However by missing session I got to go to small group after session. It was interesting to hear what boys had to say. They are so different from girls and it made me wish I would have had just one. But since I didn’t, it just explains why I find a boy every few years to pour into.
I did not go to the ER/urgent care with any of the kids this year. At first I thought it was because they didn’t think I was competent or something. I really need to work on my self-esteem. After the second kid, I learned it was because they didn’t want me to leave in case I needed to triage someone. So that helped my low self-esteem. I really need to get over it. After all I diagnosed all the kids correctly and no one died so it was a win-win. They plan to take a second nurse next year and a few adults to run kids for treatment if needed. This leads me to some sad news.
My roommate Lynn has been a true joy the last five years. She has been a huge blessing helping me with triage and talking to the kids. Every time someone knocked on the door we would be like now what and we would take turns getting up to answer it. She told me this was probably her last year. This was camp eighteen or nineteen for her. She said she just doesn’t feel as connected with the kids because she doesn’t understand the technology and her husband is not in the best shape medically. I was so sad for myself and for her as well. Everyone knows I hate change but at least I have a year to adjust to a new roommate or two at camp. I have finally come up with the perfect thank you gift for her. She will never really know how much I have appreciated her over the years!
Mole Moral ~ How different the world would be if “we saw THEM through HIM”!
Jamie took over speaking for the rest of our time together. I really enjoy him and he reminds me a lot of my sister as he also talks a hundred miles a minute. Tonight’s talk was about the wise filter which made me think of something Pastor Tom has said for years “based on my current circumstances what is the wise thing to do.” Dumb decisions don’t matter until they involve things that do matter. Everyone has filters for how they make decisions. Jamie’s examples:
I would venture a guess and say most of my decisions are based on thinking. I really don’t care what culture and others think except for maybe my husband. However he said none of these are worthy of your life decisions and smart people do dumb things. Therefore be very careful how you live, making the most of every opportunity because the days are evil. So he very careful how you live not as unwise but wise.
Jamie then brought a cardboard car front out on stage and sat behind it to demonstrate how to make wise decisions. When one drives he looks two directions both forwards and backwards. So one knows where to go based on where you been (looking behind) and where you are headed (looking ahead). His example from his high school days was that he was invited to two different parties. The last time he hung out with group a they were a lot of fun but they made a whole bunch of stupid decisions with tough consequences. Group b was a little boring but no bad decisions or tough consequences so he chose group b.
Mole moral ~ God’s “rules” seem restrictive and make for a boring life when they actually release you from experiencing pain from making unwise decisions.
The morning talk started with the comfort filter which is the best life is an easy life. That’s such an easy way to live, however it causes these issues:
1. Slow is bad (no patience for anything.
2. Hard is bad.
3. Boring is bad.
4. Risk is bad.
5. Work is bad.
By seeing the world through this filter causes you to run from the difficult, the daunting, and the dangerous. Of course I immediately start thinking of my upcoming fifty mile race in just 22 days. It most certainly fits all three categories. Difficult you bet. The training alone has been a nightmare especially in the middle of the heat wave. Running fifty plus miles a week is difficult both mentally and physically. I have to carve out huge chunks of time on the weekend to get them done. Is it daunting, you bet it is. I cannot think of it as fifty miles in twelve hours or less but more in five-mile blocks of time. Otherwise it is extremely overwhelming. Is it dangerous? You better believe it is. Without proper hydration and fuel I could easily end up in the hospital. Just moving non stop for twelve hours can be considered dangerous. Not everyone has been encouraging and I could have easily listened to them and took the comfort filter and said no way. When I had the five-week headache and had to change my race I could have also said forget it. This last month with the heat index and the mega distance, I have had to pull in every encourager into my head to move on and finish this.
So the enemy’s (Satan) goal is to make us complacent. He wants us to settle for the life we have because we become lazy, apathetic, and comfortable which keeps us from fighting. The way to get out of comfortable and into fight mode is to get off your BUT (please note the spelling).
I want to stop drinking at parties BUT all my friends are doing it and it’s fun.
I want to wait until marriage for sex BUT kissing etc feels so good.
I want to lose weight BUT exercise takes too much time and meal planning.
I want to be better mentally BUT counseling is too expensive and too hard.
Gerald concluded with the three ways to fight:
1. Be great
2. Be good (morals, character)
3. Be Godly
Mole moral~I shall run my fifty mile race knowing that God made it possible and may he shine through me.
Gerald started off the talk with who is your squad, crew, homies, or friends depending on what you call them. My squad is made up of current and past women’s health homies.
Everyone has a filter to choose their friends and some examples are fun, hot, popular, or the same as you. This had me thinking back to my high-school days and what filter I used. I would have to say it was the same filter. Almost all of my friends were in band and everyone knows band kids are the best kids. I think a big factor in this was the group that went to South Africa in August of 1983 Who is this Gary Lindsay character?). That trip and all the fundraising really bonded us together.
Just as we can use filters to include we can also use them to exclude. This then sets up the us VS them scenario. Although this certainly runs rampant in middle school and high school it can also be seen in the adult world as well. In the world of nursing it can be nurse vs techs or management vs the employees.
If we change our view and see everyone as someone God made and someone Jesus died for, it would change the world. When Jesus met up with the Samaritan woman at the well and asked her to give him a drink she said you are a Jew why are you even talking to me. A perfect example of us VS them. By the time he was finished having a conversation with her, she saw him for who he really was, just as he saw her the way God made her.
Mole moral ~ What if we saw “them” through him? It certainly would be a game changer.
Stuart Hall was not a speaker this year at camp and my first thought “oh no camp won’t be right.” Yes, I know that I am never going to learn God knows better than me. The first three sessions were given by Gerald Fadayomi who is with Brown church a division of North Point. He was awesome. After session last night Josh said something to the effect that he has been coming to camp for many years and he was the best speaker. After this out of my mouth flies “I agree” like really loud. This had to be God yelling through me because I am not a loud person in a crowd of people I do not know.
This years theme is Filters and the first night was called the US filter. Everyone has a filter for their life and it’s how they see the world. Gerald gave some examples.
1. The fun filter~This person is all about fun, where the party is, or the class clown.
2. The fashion filter~ This person is all about fashion and sees the world through style. They judge people on what they are wearing. This is certainly not me as I pretty much wear Big Stuf t-shirts year round. And we won’t even talk about my lack of shoe wear.
3. The achievement filter~ This person is all about making straight A’s and maintaining the 4.3 GPA and climbing the corporate ladder of success.
4. The guy humor filter~ The guy that always waits till the perfect time to make stupid guy jokes.
5. The relationship filter~ The person who sees every one of the opposite sex as relationship worthy or not.
For most of my life my filter was trust no one and don’t let anyone get too close because I never knew when they might jump ship. This stemmed from my parents getting divorced. I did not even realize I viewed life this way until I met an awesome counselor nine years ago and attended Big Stuf camp. After I changed my filter, my life became a whole lot richer. One of the main points was how you see, is how you be. That really hit home for me.
Do not copy the behaviors and customs of this world but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. This would be my interpretation of some verses in Romans that I forgot to write down. God wants to have input in the way you see so Gerald suggested to change your behavior, you have to change your vision. I’ve been working on stopping cursing. Some days are better than others but I started by subing in dirt bag. I decided when I see curse words different, I will be different and no longer be a sailor mouth.
Mole moral ~ Dear God, Help me to set my filters aside so you can transform my mind. Love, CR