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Beauty Beyond Bones

This is the name of a blog who has been following me for quite some time. At first I thought maybe it had been a year but then I get to thinking back and it seemed like she found me right after Big Stuf the summer of 2016. I remembered this because her blog is about recovery from anorexia and there was a girl at camp that summer that was struggling with it. I actually had preconceived notions about her dad (nothing related to the eating disorder) and he came to camp to keep an eye on her. I spent some time with him and God was like bam you idiot stop looking at people through your eyes only. I meant to start reading her blog back then but I never got around to it.

One of the reasons is I’m lazy about reading. I use to love to read but now given the choice I will waste time playing stupid games on my phone. The other reason is my sister has battled an eating disorder off and on since she was 18 years old. It is always very easy to tell how she is doing based on where her weight is at. So maybe a week or so ago I decided now was the time and started at the beginning. I think she has been writing for 2 1/2 years so I am no where close to being caught up. I haven’t even finished the first year. All of the posts are so good that I have been taking my time reading them and reflecting on them.

I think by about the fifth or sixth blog a light bulb went on in my head and I understood why my counselor told me that I could easily slip into an eating disorder. (That conversation with her also showed up on time hop a month or so ago). I remember telling her at the time I enjoyed food too much. I also remembered that was back when I was running a lot. Ok I know I just trained and ran a fifty but I did this much slower and walked a lot of the training. Back then I could run a half marathon with no walking. And i was super focused on nutrition and what I was eating. The last year I have managed to eat all junk and highly processed food and if I hadn’t been training I would have easily been right back to my starting weight (170) for the fourth time in my life. However food and nutrition is my next blog post. I don’t even know this girls name but so much of what she has written I have totally related to. I remember studying eating disorders in nursing school and telling Brian I had all the signs and he told me that was the stupidest thing he had ever heard. Back then I thought wow maybe I am stupid but I learned a long time ago when he cannot handle something he says stupid things.

So yes this girl went to inpatient for recovery but she said her recovery did not start there but actually with Jesus and when she realized he died on the cross for HER. She relates a lot of her life to bible stories which I love because it’s like reading the bible. I told you I just don’t read like I use to. It’s also like being in church while laying on my couch. She is not preachy or over bearing or obnoxious, she is just awesome. So today at church my favorite young adult sang my favorite song. I heard it first when she sang it and she sings it better than Steffany Gretzinger. While we were singing it I thought of Beauty and I hope she has heard it. Here are the words and as you read it, imagine Jesus saying it to YOU only.

Come out of hiding
You’re safe here with Me
There’s no need to cover
What I already see

You’ve got your reasons
But I hold your peace
You’ve been on lockdown
And I hold the key

‘Cause I loved you before you knew it was love
And I saw it all, still I chose the cross
And you were the one that I was thinking of
When I rose from the grave

Now rid of the shackles, My victory’s yours
I tore the veil for you to come close
There’s no reason to stand at a distance anymore
You’re not far from home

I’ll be your lighthouse
When you’re lost at sea
And I will illuminate everything

No need to be frightened
By intimacy
No, just throw off your fear
And come running to Me

‘Cause I loved you before you knew it was love
And I saw it all, still I chose the cross
And you were the one that I was thinking of
When I rose from the grave
Now rid of the shackles, My victory’s yours
I tore the veil for you to come close
There’s no reason to stand at a distance anymore
You’re not far from home
Keep on coming

And oh as you run
What hindered love
Will only become
Part of the story
Baby, you’re almost home now
Please don’t quit now
You’re almost home to Me

She has over 5000 followers as of February 2016 so this post certainly isn’t about blog promotion because she doesn’t necessarily need that. But if you want to read something that is God focused and really good then click here.

 

Mole Moral~ Sometimes putting off till tomorrow what you can read today, leads to a really nice surprise.

 
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Mike the Headless Chicken

This roadside attraction app is going to be the death of Emily and me. While stopping for breakfast I saw that Mike the headless chicken statue was up ahead on the road. So McDonald’s took forever to get our food and we decide to eat in the car while getting gas. At the first gas station the credit was down so we had to go to another. Then I navigate us two miles the wrong way and we have to turn around. We pass the chicken up and we have to turn around again. Then I spot a post office as I need to mail the cards (for the residents who are leaving next week) to Becky so she can give them to them for me. (I’m missing the going away party for this road trip.) Just as we dropped it in the mailbox, Emily starts screaming there is a Pokémon she doesn’t have so we turn around again. We have no increased our ETA by an hour all for this.

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LIFE With Mike the Headless Chicken: Photos of a Famously Tough Fowl

“Ever since Sept. 10,” LIFE breezily informed its readers, “a rangy Wyandotte rooster named Mike has been living a normal chicken’s life though he has no head.”

Mike, LIFE went on to say, “lost his head in the usual rooster way. Mrs. L.A. Olson, wife of a farmer in Fruita, Colo., 200 miles west of Denver, decided to have chicken for dinner. Mrs. Olson took Mike to the chopping block and axed off his head. Thereupon Mike got up and soon began to strut around…. What Mrs. Olson’s ax had done was to clip off most of the skull but leave intact one ear, the jugular vein and the base of the brain, which controls motor function.”

The rest is poultry history. Mike lived for 18 months after losing his head, finally succumbing at a motel in the Arizona desert in 1946 during one of his many appearances as a sideshow attraction in the American southwest.

Here, LIFE.com presents Mike’s unlikely story, as well as the utterly unsettling pictures that ran (and some that never ran) in LIFE. Brace yourself. . . .

This article courtesy of Time and if you want to see photos of the actual chicken click here.

 

Mole moral~ Headless chickens are creepy, almost as creepy as stopping to see the statue of one.

 

 

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Is this real life?

Two days ago Rockhurst University sent out an email letting the students know that Westboro Baptist Church would be protesting at their graduation. My very first thought, of course they are because that is life with moles. Someone then posted the flyer which really annoyed me. Actually that is an understatement.

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Let me start with the website, god hates fags? WTF? Sorry for the language but seriously. First all God does not hate anyone. I mean that would be super hard if he did indeed create everyone in his image. So he hates himself? And the word fag, are we back in the era that I grew up in. Last I checked Jesus did not hang out with the so-called religious people but instead all the regular normal people and it probably included “fags” but there may not be a Hebrew word for that term so it was left out. Totally kidding but trying to make a point in my CR way.

Also Rockhurst is a Jesuit University, as in Catholic. So the Catholic faith is nothing but a lie as well. Either these people are stupid or crazy but most likely both. They had wonderful community outreach and service projects. One of the best stories Emily has is when her sorority sister Julie wanted to do a planting project and out of Emily’s mouth flies “do I look like I garden?” Julie’s dad did not let her live that one down. Since the Catholic church totally believes that Jesus is God’s son and he rose from the dead, I cannot understand these people. However it should make for a great story come Saturday when Emily receives her doctorate in physical therapy.

 

Mole Moral ~ It is good to share one’s faith with others, however when you are screaming and attempting to shove your beliefs down someone’s throat the effort is futile.

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How He Loves

How He Loves is by far the very best and most important song ever written. There is incredible meaning and a story that goes along with it that I will get to a little later in this post.

Most people do not know that I have had a headache for over a month straight. It all started at work during a meeting. I did write about my visit to the ER eight days later.(CR visits the ER) I remained headache free until the day after I finished the steroids and then it came right back. It finally got to the point that by five or six in the evening I could no longer function at work and the supervisor would have to watch my patients while I slept before I could even drive home. The last day I worked I realize now that I could barely function and people would talk to me but I could hardly register what they were saying. On a Saturday I started having numbness and tingling in my arm and face so I had my sister drop me off at the ER. This time they did not give me compazine because of the twitching and what they gave me did not touch my headache. They decided to admit me to do a MRI/MRV to check to make sure I did not have blood clots in my sinuses. All of that came back normal. I was in the hospital for six days and even had a lumbar puncture. Every single test was negative. Nothing they gave me got rid of the headache and I slept a lot more than I realized. So they sent me home on a Friday and said your headache will go away eventually. That weekend was horrible. I started throwing up on top of being in the worst pain of my life. I asked God several times to just take me to Heaven to be with my grandparents, but apparently Jesus isn’t ready for CR because I am still here. Finally on Tuesday the nausea left, the pain cut in half and I could sit up without feeling like my head was going to explode. For ten days I could really only tolerate laying on my right or left side I couldn’t even lay on my back without feeling like my head was going to explode. It was just awful.

Tonight I went to the Edge (our youth service) and its the first time I have been out of the house in over two weeks. I mean I have left to take short walks around the neighborhood but I have not been anywhere else besides the hospital. Tonight the band played How He Loves. It’s been a long time since I have sung that song at church. The first time I heard it was 2008 at Big Stuf camp. That was the first year I went to camp and it was a game changer for my life. During the camp for the first time I ever I could feel that God loved me. Prior to that I never felt anyone really loved me. I knew in my head people loved me but I couldn’t feel it.  This kind of talk did not go over well with my husband who told me basically that was the stupidest thing he had ever heard and I was wrong. I was already in counseling and that was the final straw, I started looking at apartments because I was finished with him. (A friend of mine told me about the movie Fireproof and we did The Love Dare and all things changed.) However for the next two years or so every single time I heard that song, I would end up crying by the time it was over. Well tonight that song started and the tears started full force. God was with me during one of the most difficult times in my life back then and I knew he was here with me right now. It was like he was saying hey CR I’m still here and you will get through this as well. I thought I could explain this experience in words but it’s just not working out.

My headache has greatly decreased which is how I am even able to write this blog. Usually when I try concentrating it starts ramping up but so far so good. I have an appointment with a headache neurologist on Thursday. They are calling this an irregular migraine. I am not really buying this as I have never had a migraine in my life. These headaches usually start in the teen years. Brian has had migraines since he was a kid and he said he has never seen anything like the way I have been. They wanted me to take a bunch of drugs to prevent the next one. I could not stand the drugged up way I felt so I stopped taking all of them. Plus why am I trying to prevent something that won’t even go away. We shall have a nice discussion at this appointment. I want the cause of the headache discovered and resolved, not sit around in a semi comatose state for the rest of my life.

How He Loves

He is jealous for me, loves like a hurricane, I am a tree
Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy
When all of a sudden I am unaware of these afflictions
Eclipsed by glory and I realize just how beautiful You are
And how great Your affections are for me

And oh, how He loves us, oh
Oh, how He loves us, how He loves us all

He is jealous for me, loves like a hurricane, I am a tree
Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy
When all of a sudden I am unaware of these afflictions
Eclipsed by glory and I realize just how beautiful You are
And how great Your affections are for me

Oh, how He loves, yeah, He loves us
Oh, how He loves us, oh, how He loves us
Oh, how He loves

And we are His portion and He is our prize
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes
If His grace is an ocean, we’re all sinking

And heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest
I don’t have time to maintain these regrets
When I think about the way

Oh, how He loves us, oh
Oh, how He loves us, how He loves all
How He loves

Yeah, He loves us, oh, how He loves us
Oh, how He loves us, oh how He loves
Oh, I love

Yeah, He loves us, yeah, He loves us
How He loves us, oh, how He loves us all

 

Mole Moral ~ My final diagnosis will be NURSE CURSE!

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Two is better than one

img_3288Brian has been driving a work van for about five years now. It also happened to be the oldest one in the fleet. He works for C&R but if you don’t notice the and sign it looks like he drives a CR (crazy Rachel) van which is comical and takes people by surprise when they see it for the first time. So a couple of weeks ago it passed inspection but the check engine light was on and some fix it codes came up. The company decided it was time to replace it (as it is a 2002) instead of fix it. Well I hadn’t heard anything about a replacement.

On Wednesday when Brian was driving home from a class (pipe-fitter’s have continuing education units they must obtain to keep their license active) for the second time a tire blew out on that van while driving down the highway. Either Brian is an excellent driver or it just wasn’t his time to go because he managed not to have an accident either time.

I came home on Friday to see this in the driveway. Brian has to take all of his junk (I mean tools and stuff) out of the old van and put it in the new one. Since he has to think about everything before he does anything he told his boss he couldn’t do it on work time it would take all day. I have a feeling he might be finished when I get home from my 22 mile run today. But I will not be surprised if he is still working on it. He is dressed in his heavy work jumpsuit and tells me I’m soft because I am not running outside today. It it were five or ten miles I would but I’m not about to be out in 30 degree weather for six hours. I’m not that crazy.

Kayla is home this weekend as one of her friends is having a baby shower. So that means ring around the driveway as if Emily is home too. Yes I do miss my girls but I never miss their cars!

 

Mole Moral ~ If you want a new work vehicle, just have it need a bunch of work and blow out a tire. It gets replaced much faster!

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The Mole year 2016 review

The last five weeks have been very stressful so I thought I would write out what happened during the rest of the year to verify that it all balanced out.

January~ Emily and I took a trip to visit Uncle Larry and to see Cousin Eddie. We flew Southwest and since Emily had flown a “real airline” with her friend Izy, she complained about layovers and having to fight for a seat. We rented a car and ate at a diner where she could have chicken and waffles. She loved it!

February~I conned Emily into running another half marathon with me. She swore after Disneyland she was never going to run one again. I made her a Dorothy running costume and myself a flying monkey and we beat her previous time. Of course she took off ahead of me so she could finish a few seconds faster. We also visited the Wizard of Oz museum which was really interesting and the room we stayed in at the motel was decked out in wizard of oz.

March~Kayla and I went to visit Missouri State in Springfield to see if that’s where she wanted to attend college. She loved it but would later drag me to University of Central Missouri and then take forever to finally decide to go to Missouri State. She waited so long and we had an issue with her meningitis shot that she ended up getting a dorm room to herself. She was quite upset because she thought a roommate would be someone to do everything with and explore campus.

April~Emily received her white coat for Physical Therapy. This meant she was ready to start clinical’s in the summer. No one ever wears their white coat but they all have one. Brian and Allyson did not get the memo to wear nice clothes and they showed up in jeans. But the rest of us looked amazing. I also ran my first full marathon since my foot surgery. I shorted myself two weeks of training and wanted to die by the time it was finished. It started raining for about two miles and was a terrible experience.

May~This was the month I decided to try low carb/high fat diet. It worked great except for when it came to running. I did a half marathon in Branson Missouri with my friend Laura and I again wanted to die about half way through. I certainly was not hungry eating this way but I couldn’t sustain long runs so had to ditch that for the wind.

June~Kayla and I went on a 5 day cruise. We only had two scheduled stops and the second stop was cancelled due to high winds and waves or something. We did get to swim with stingrays but totally missed snorkeling. So instead we had mother daughter pictures taken and had a lot of fun with the photographer. I ended up spending way too much money on the pictures but it was worth it. Emily was in Oklahoma for clincials so I went and saw her and also got to see Rob Bell in person. He was awesome as always and totally worth the seven hour drive. Allyson really enjoyed stopping by the precious moments chapel on the way home.

July~ While the family was at the lake I remembered I had stated four years ago I wanted to run fifty miles by my fiftieth birthday which was the following May. I spent an afternoon researching how to train for such an event. Soleil was finally starting to recover from her bladder infection. My car did not pass inspection so after eleven years and 184,000 miles I had to say good-bye to the VUE. Big Stuf was probably the best camp since the first year I attended. All the speakers were fabulous and I really enjoyed them.

August~Emily’s guinea pig died under my care. We put him in the freezer until she could return from Oklahoma for a proper burial. Kayla moved to Missouri State and Allyson started her sophomore year. The house was quiet and peaceful again.

September~My favorite doctor left Mercy and I still miss him. I went on a two week cruise with my mom. I visited Mercy Dublin and saw where it all started back in the 1800’s. It was cool to walk down Baggot street. I also ran a full marathon on the cruise ship.

October~I ran my 50K in preparation for the fifty mile race in the end of April. I drug Emily and Allyson along as my crew. It was a 0.8 mile loop and I did like 36 laps. I finished much faster than I had hoped but wasn’t too sure if I really wanted to pound out fifty miles. However I had thrown down the gauntlet so there was no turning back.

November~My brother in law had a stroke on Black Friday. I learned that there really is a difference between Mercy and other hospitals. There really is something to the Mercy spirit that we are evaluated on each year. It also reinforced why I have driven by St. Anthony’s for the past twenty-eight years and would never ever work there.

December~We had a nice Christmas and I received great running pants from the husband. I lost my favorite black pair on the cruise. I haven’t seen them since I returned home. I have started fifty mile training and still wonder why I said that.

 

Mole Moral~If 2017 is half as crazy as 2016 bring it on!

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A Mole Christmas Poem

Twas the night before Christmas and all the Moles were wide awake.

Well except for dad Mole who was in bed just before ten.

Emily was scrapbooking ,while Kayla was playing on her phone

and Allyson was gaming on her computer, and I mom Mole was writing this blog.

Now Santa was waiting for the freaks to go to bed.

Mom Mole yelled “you freaks go to bed so Santa can come.”

They all laughed and got louder and louder and louder.

Then dad Mole awoke from his sleep and said,

That’s it, everyone to bed right this minute.

As usual no one listened but they did become quiet.

Eventually they all fell asleep and Santa arrived.

However he tripped and fell over the dirt in the floor

Allyson had refused to sweep the morning before.

She said there was no reason to clean because

only family was coming and why should they care.

Now Santa’s in the hospital with a broken leg

And no more presents were delivered that day.

 

Mole Moral ~ Always clean the house before company arrives,

it may just be family but a visitor could show up.

It would be embarrassing  if they too became injured,

from dirt on the floor.