My sister called me today to let me know the end really is near for our friend Bob who has been fighting ALS. She was really upset and usually calls me because my bizarre sense of humor tends to make people feel better and laugh. Well today we somehow got on this memory from our earlier childhood.

I am not sure exactly how old we were at the time but we had to older than 9 and 12 because we were living in our house that my mom bought all by herself. Now this was a pretty unusual thing as she was a divorced woman and the year would have been 1979 maybe. Anyway it must have been summer vacation because I awoken to my sister telling me there was a man in the house. Now my sister is a hypochondriac at times and a big fat fraidy cat. So I told her no there wasn’t and to go back to her room and go to sleep. Then all of a sudden I heard a mans voice talking on our phone. This is back in the day of wall phones with cords so when I carefully peeked out of my room I could see the phone cord stretched down the hallway. I freaked out, but remained calm and did what my mother always told us to do. I got my sister and we went out my bedroom window. Thank God it was on the front of the house and not the back. So we went across the street to the neighbors to call my mom at work. Now my mom remained calm to us on the phone but freaked out because she remembered there being a strange car parked in front of our house when she left for work that morning. So she called the cops and headed home. We watched the cops show up at our house and go in. They then came and got us and said the person had identified themselves as our aunt. (My aunt is a lesbian (the man) but was a huge secret back then because people tended to think that preference preferred kids as well. That is stupid and my aunt only was involved with women but we didn’t share with anyone because no one would be allowed at our house. Oh she did live with us for a year or two but that’s a different story). Ok I will admit that I went just a little nuts. To the point the cop had to restrain me and take me off the front porch. This could have easily been an episode of cops. So when my mom finally arrived and found out it was her sister, she was livid. She had to take off work (not really accepted back in those days) and worry the whole way home that we could have been killed, only to find out it was her sister talking in her butch voice. Let’s just say my aunt did get the scare of her life when she looked up and the cop had his gun pointed right at her head, asking her what she thought she was doing.

As my sister and I were reflecting on this story she was cracking up laughing. I said see I did it again. You called me crying and you hang up laughing. It is a gift from God I suppose. So if you ever need a laugh just call CR, I have many many more of these stories!

It’s been a while since I posted anything. I have been in a not ok place and haven’t even been able to think of anything remotely funny to post. However today on the way to vote it came to me but first what is not ok.

I had to come to terms with the fact that I am not going to run anytime soon if ever. If I try to run more than twice a week, my foot that did not have surgery hurts so bad I can barely walk. I am not happy just running twice a week and my addicted brain immediately starts thinking try a third day and then I’m back in pain. So last week I rejoined the rec center. I previously had a six month membership that expired shortly before my surgery. I never really thought i would have to renew it. However with a choice of another surgery so I can run again or swimming and biking I choose the latter. My goal is no running until January 1 and then if I still can’t pick it up without my left foot screaming I will then consider surgery. My doctor told me that 99% of the time when you fix one foot, it fixes the other. I remember looking at him and saying great you are talking to me the nurse curse queen. And to those of you who say quit running, please think of something you love to do and then let me tell you never do it again. It’s really hard. So anyway with new fitness goals in mind I am getting out of my feel sorry for myself slump.

So today as I am driving to vote I start thinking about how Jesus said it’s not wise for a Christian and a non-Christian to marry. What his advice should have been is a democrat should not marry a republican. If you want to start a fight in our house just mention politics. Today Brian said I see you voted. I said heck yeah I had to negate your vote. He then told me that anyone that supports my party is stupid. I chose not to respond because it would have been a pointless fight. Although I guess it is better to fight about politics than God!

Mole moral If you are a republican marry one and if you are a democrat marry one and your life will be so much easier! And way less fighting about an issue where almost every single person in politics is corrupt!

It was twenty nine years ago that someone named Brian Moehlmann showed up at my doorstep wearing this shirt. (Yes, I have kept it all these years. A couple of years ago he put it on and told me it still fit. I told him it fit like the Hulk was wearing it, about to bust out of it. It was so funny looking on). Anyway why I ever got into the car is beyond me. Most likely because my really good friend Lisa Rush fixed us up because Brian was thin and I liked thin guys. Something must have clicked on that date because it’s been 29 years and still growing strong. I met his mom on our first date too. I am not sure where his dad was but they had just gotten a fairly new dog that was being stubborn about potty training. We ended up playing pool in his basement. Or I should say he played, I watched. I rarely play pool to this day because he is some sort of pool shark and I suck! It’s only nine more days until we have been married for 24 years. Allyson told us a couple of weeks ago that we will never be divorced. We both shook our heads and then smacked our foreheads and said bummer! Life with moles, interesting in a bizarre sort of way!

My day started yesterday with Emily waking me up to tell me her car was dead again. It had died two days prior at school and Rockhurst security jumped her. She drove it for a while. She said her lights were on both times and she didn’t leave them on. That kid has never left her lights on so I am thinking is it some weird glitch from the dash being ripped apart. She found a ride to school but she was supposed to babysit for Shelly for the first time and asked if she should cancel. I said no way you made a commitment and we will figure out a way to make it work. After thinking for maybe five minutes I knew I was going to have to go and switch cars out to bring it home and have it looked at. I think PT school might actually be worse than nursing school! I remember my stress level and considering Emily is just like me there is no way she could deal with trying to find a place to have her car looked at, being without a vehicle for a couple of days and all the other crap that goes along with it. She will be home in two weeks but no way could she deal every morning was her car going to be dead or start. So the dog and I took a road trip. The dog got play with her PT friends on campus and loved it. We went out to lunch/dinner and then called the triple A guy. Emily had to leave to babysit before he showed up. He checked the battery. Said it was four years old and being totally discharged twice in three days it was pretty much shot. He offered to put a new one in. I said heck yes then I could stop to use the restroom if needed and the car would start. He thinks the fuse to the radio is still in the on position (normally turns off when you turn off the car) and is draining the battery so Brian’s job is to get it off. I think we might have to take it in just to make sure they didn’t jack up any other electrical stuff when they destroyed her dash for the cheap radio. So so annoying.

I had plans yesterday to work on the California trip and to run. I knew yesterday it was going to rain today so I decided if it rained all day then I would just watch Criminal minds (it was on last night while I was driving home) and use my treadmill. However it stopped raining and I got my run in. I think I have finally found the key to that. I have only been running two days a week and my foot has been incision pain-free since the Ovarian cancer run. Now the goal is to break the thought in my head to try three days a week! I need to be content with two for now because two is way better than NONE!

Allyson finally had enough baby teeth fall out that she could see the orthodontist So before I made the appointment i learned Dr. Herr (in Arnold) had retired but someone has taken over his practice. The new guy is still there Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday and then up north on thursday and Friday. So we went today and as we were driving there I was thinking about Kayla’s x-rays. Her bottom teeth touched the roof of her mouth so her mandible was jutted so far forward Dr. Herr was concerned and said it was a good thing she came in when she did. Well Allyson’s x-ray was even worse. Her front top and bottom teeth came together in such a way that it looked like she had a bird’s beak going on. Rather freaked me out and the doctor too. But when he evaluated Allyson mouth it turned out it was more the way she held her teeth but her jaw  was in good alignment. She still has four baby teeth, three of which are molars. She is 13 1/2 and he did not recommend waiting until they finally fall out as they are impeding her jaw bone from growing evenly so her teeth look like they have hills and valleys. He said she can get the bands on first if the dentist can’t get her in. So tomorrow I will call for that appointment.

The benefit lady told me that they have Allyson’s birthday wrong with our dental insurance. So it took her a while to get our benefits. She tried arguing with me that I had a 1500 lifetime max. I said no we have crazy insurance and have 1500 a year to spend however so if I put it all towards braces then preventive care will be out-of-pocket. She was convinced I was crazy. Well when she came back, guess who was right? Yeah me. She said that it was the craziest thing she ever heard of. I said tell me about it, it’s the third time I have dealt with it and it makes it really difficult to determine how much will be paid towards braces. So since she will have them on for two years I can get two years worth and we agreed on having the insurance cover 2000 giving me 500 a year for preventive care etc. There is a chance that two of Allyson’s bottom permanent teeth will have to come out in six months which will then make the braces stay on 30 months instead of 24. I told you her teeth were a mess. So what is the final cost of these braces you ask.

FIVE THOUSAND THREE HUNDRED DOLLARS! So I will be paying 3300 out-of-pocket. It’s a good thing Kayla is going to community college this year. These kids cost a small fortune. I thought diapers and formula were bad. Emily’s braces 12 years ago was 3500 and Kayla’s were 4200. Thank God I don’t have any more kids because I would have to tell them you can have crooked teeth and learn how to be a ventriloquist. Haha just kidding. Well sort of!