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Unable to deal with the general public

Yesterday was quite the day. It all started when I decided today was the day I was getting Allyson’s phone to work. For quite some time she could receive text messages but not send them. Two weeks ago I called tech support and they had to submit a ticket.  I then got a text saying issue resolved, yet it wasn’t. So I headed up to my store but my favorite sales guy wasn’t working. The guy waiting on me said he had never seen that (go figure, only a mole) and sent me to olive to the support center. When I arrived I could either make an appointment or wait 2 1/2 hours. I chose to wait because I actually had the phone in my hand and it was charged. I then decided to write a letter to my cousin using email. This was a brilliant idea, except I text one finger (he calls me one finger texter and thinks it’s hilarious.) so by the time I was finished my wrist was on fire. Everyone that walked in was pissed about the wait and copped an attitude. I felt bad for the two guys working although it has to be their calling to deal with this hostile environment every day. A couple of people left and would be texted when it was their turn. They didn’t make it back in time, so I got to go. When they showed up they copped another attitude about their time being valuable. I almost said then you shoulf have made an appointment. It would have been stupid for the tech support guys to wait ten minutes until they showed up. Shortly before I was called up, this guy came in and carried on for ten minutes about how his phone doesn’t work and what would they do for him. The guy patiently repeated over and over three-hour wait and then he could help him. The guy left and the worker said its a tequila night to which I shouted shots for everyone. That made everyone laugh. Allyson’s phone was fixed in 15 minutes. It needed a new SIM card.

My next stop was ugas for coffee  I get home and have a Facebook message. I dropped my debit card in the parking lot. I get behind this guy that says he has gas on 6. Right after the lady next to him says she has had on 6. He cops a giant attitude until he is proved wrong. Then tries to say signage is bad. I almost said you are blind and stupid. Then it becomes a math nightmare before he finally leaves. I come home and shut the garage door. I then announce I’m not leaving the house again unless I have a tranquilizer gun. Needless to say, I stayed in

Mole moral ~ Typing this on my phone while waiting for work to start was a stupid idea. My wrist is on fire again. I need to inject myself with a tranquilizer gun especially after the drive in with the snow

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Today’s reality check

I worked today and now that my foot has been pain-free for almost 4 months I enjoy my job 99.9% of the time. I even enjoyed today even though I was smacked with reality three times in less than four hours.

Today my bosses were interviewing a new nurse for nights. They were showing her around the unit and introduced me as the seasoned nurse. I looked her and said “I bet I’ve been a nurse longer than you have been alive.” I followed that statement up with “let me go check myself into a nursing home”. This May will be 27 years since I graduated from Deaconess College of Nursing.

Next I was chatting with my patient who is my mom’s age. We were discussing the ages of our kids. When she said hers were 47-53 I thought what is she talking about, her kids should be in their 20’s. I then remembered my mom saying she would be disowning me when I am 50 because she is not old enough to have a 50-year-old daughter. And if this lady is my mom’s age then her kids should be my age and I am not in my twenties even though I always think I am in my head.

Lastly, I ran into a respiratory therapist I haven’t seen long enough to chat with since I left the burn unit almost 15 years ago. I asked him if he ever got married and if he ever had kids.Yes was the answer to both and his kids are 15 and 18. Ok how did that happen, he still looked 25 to me and certainly could not have children that old. Later on I kind of remember his first daughter being born but that was so long ago and yet also seems like just yesterday.

Mole moral~ Time keeps on passing by, and I am getting older. However I will always be 20 and all my friends will be the same age as when I met them as well as their kids. No one ever gets older in my head. Perhaps that is what Heaven will be like!

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Full Circle (yes another cake posting)

IMG_4565Today I walked in the Beggin Barkus Pet Parade with the cake lovers. (http://stlouis250cakelovers.com). I had such a good time meeting new people who have the same love for these crazy cakes as I do. Let me back up to Allyson’s and mine second cake adventure. This was right after we had returned from Big Stuf camp. Our tenth cake was at Clementine’s which was St. Louis first LGBT bar. There were two men sitting outside and when we walked up to the cake, one asked us how many cakes we had seen. I said about ten or so. He told me I must see many more, that finding them is half the fun. (I thought he was kind of crazy at the time, little did I know). He then introduced himself as the cake artist. I said get over here and have your picture taken with my daughter. He asked if I was sure and I said yes. He then told me he also did the Powell Symphony Hall cake. Well I knew at that moment I would for sure have to see that cake. After I got home, I looked up his name and he is Earl Miller.

So today which cake do you think was on the float? The one in the picture of course. And somehow I managed to be the one in the back to help Earl steer the float. This made me extremely nervous because it’s just like steering a boat which I cannot do well at all. I think Earl figured this out pretty quickly and probably wanted to shoot me. I had a hard time talking to him because he’s a cake artist and in my head famous. It would be no different from walking with Michael J Fox. The parade was very cool because I love dogs. Heck growing up I wanted to own a dog farm. I got over that, way too much work but I still love them. I saw so many cool ones. Since it was a pet parade there were other pets there as well. I saw a rooster, a goldfish, a cat, a huge bunny in a stroller and a pig. And some of these guys had on some crazy costumes. I didn’t take any pictures though. After the parade we had to take the float back to Nadine’s Gin Joint (Clementines closed the end of September and the cake was hosted in front of Soulard Art Market) where it will permanently reside. On the way back the float tipped over and the cake went crashing to the ground. My heart stopped beating and I flashed back to dropping mine out in the front yard. At least this time I didn’t gouge my leg which I still have the mark from. I felt horrible especially since Earl was right there. I set my bag down and totally forgot about it. Thankfully, Jason was paying attention and grabbed it for me. So we righted it and then somehow I ended up in charge of steering. Those of you who know why my passenger side view mirror is missing can understand the comedy of me being in charge. When we got back I told Earl I was sorry it fell and he told me not to worry it wasn’t damaged. There were a couple of scuff marks but I am sure he could fix that in two seconds flat where it would take someone like me three weeks or longer. I would have to research it and think about it for a while. Better to take my time than to mess it up.

Mole moral~I would have never guessed last summer that I would be walking with a cake artist and his cake. One of the most coolest cake experiences so far.

 

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Buckram

This week Allyson informs me she needs buckram for a project she is working on. I ask her what she is talking about. So she shows me a picture on the internet and it seems to be a type of material. I say google it and see if they sell it at Joann’s fabrics because I would hate to pay shipping on something that is listed at 1.75 and sure enough they do. So I do what every crazy crafter does, I go up there a couple of days later to get her more fur for her fur suit and this buckram for the eyes of the mask she is making. So I ask the girl cutting the material where it might be located. She has no idea and says to check crafts. Well, I wander around over there for a little while and then I get on the internet and type in where is buckram located at Joann’s fabrics. I was surprised to find someone’s post that said “I am making a fur suit and I need buckram, do they carry it at Joann’s?” Someone responded with in the material section by the tent type material. And sure enough there it was. So when I went back to have that piece cut it was a different gal who was older than the clueless wonder I asked first. She was impressed that I found it and told me most people had never heard of it. So I gave her the whole fur suit story. So within two days Allyson had the eyes finished and complete with glasses.

Mole moral~if you know how to ask a question in a search engine, you can almost always find the answer! It’s a good thing I am pretty good at it!

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Labels

imagesLast week at church Tom talked about everyone having labels and labeling everything and everyone. For some reason this stirred up all the negative labels I have ever had in my life. They all floated around in my head all week which is probably one reason why I had nothing to write about it or even status update on Facebook this week. I’ve been quite and even one of my bosses said I wasn’t myself this week. Even though Tom ended with the only label anyone really has is “the treasured child of the most high God” it didn’t really help me feel better.

Today at church Josh finished up the series and summarized the first three weeks. All of a sudden all the positive labels came to mind. It started with one of my favorites given to me not to long ago. I’ve been a nurse since Jesus was a young boy. Ok so I do have the most RN experience on my floor and only one tech as more than I do. She’s ten years ahead of me in the game. It just cracks me up and it also cracks the patients up when I use that line. It usually gets brought up when they ask how old my kids are and then tell me I don’t look near old enough and don’t believe my true age.

The next one that popped up was CR for crazy Rachel. That also started at work but probably at least seven years ago. They call me crazy in a good way most of the time. I mean how many people run a 1/2 marathon and then a full marathon back to back. Or come into work at anytime between 8 and 3 depending on when one is needed and then take five or six new admissions. Yep CR!

Then funny came along. I first heard that from my counselor when she told me that i am really funny and really good in tough situations with using humor. Ever since she told me that I have tried to embrace my humor and use it to help others.

Next good writer. I have had several people tell me I need to write a book. I don’t think I have the discipline for that so I will stick to this blog. I am horrible at English and spelling and grammar and whatever else goes along with that but I suppose that is what people pay editors for. However I have no plans to write a book anytime soon.

And finally I will end with creative because if I don’t shut up the negative label of conceited will come to mind. I usually deny my creativity but that would be a bold face lie. The Christmas stocking that I did for work (see previous blog) prove that wrong. I am currently still working on the t-shirt quilt from hell. I have learned a lot (the hard way) about what to do and not to do. I am still working on the cake ornaments and they turned out pretty good considering I have never painted a day in my life. I have four left of those to finish. It has come to me in waves as to how to decorate them for each person. For example my niece Sierra we started calling Finster almost from day 1. She has always acted like Chuckie Finster from Rugrats. So on hers I put a picture of Chuckie and wrote Finster Meister because that is what Brian usually calls her. But no I am not creative at all.

So here’s to a better week and some fun Mole adventures to write about.

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Fractions

It’s been a fairly quiet week or two around the house so not much to write about. And the things I would like to write about involve work and cannot be posted in a public forum anyway. I so enjoy my work, especially since the steroid injection has worn off my left foot and with massive stretching, I have been pain-free.

Anyway I still have not finished my cake Christmas ornaments but when I do I will blog about that. Instead I have decided to start working on the t-shirt quilt for one of Emily’s friends. This is only my third one and the first two were all the same sized blocks which made it really easy. This girls shirts gave me the idea to combine two into one square and four into one. This requires knowledge of fractions to get it all to work out correctly. Each big square will be 12×12 after sewing (12.5×12.5 before to allow for 1.25 seam allowance on each side). The smaller squares will have material in between at .5 inch so see how this becomes I fraction nightmare. We shall see how it all turns out when I’m finished. I guess this proves basic math is used in everyday life. As for the square root of something maybe. The quilt is 25 blocks and wouldn’t the square root be 5?

Mole moral: One never knows when one will use something they learned a long long time ago!

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It’s not a pocketknife, its a machete

All three girls have spent their money they received from Grandpa John for Christmas. Emily bought herself two new pairs of jeans. Kayla ran out and got her belly button pierced. She has harassed me for years to which I said, I am not signing for it so you will have to wait until you are 18 and pay for it with your own money. Hey she did follow the rules. Now if she will only stop showing it to me because it makes me want to throw up. I cannot stand sticking my finger in  my bellybutton so I cannot imagine having an earring in it. Let me go vomit before I finish typing this. And then there was Allyson. She found a knife on the internet that she wanted and it was within budget. I thought it was going to be a knife that would fit in her pocket. It came in the mail while I was at work yesterday and when I came home Emily said it was a machete. The thing is huge and certainly not a pocketknife. Allyson said it’s not sharp at all. To which Emily said she and dad are planning on going to Johnny’s (Brian’s life long friend and hunting/fishing buddy) and sharpening it all up. I suppose if Allyson can shoot a deer with a rifle, she can own this sharp giant knife with a scorpion handle.

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Mole moral~Always check the dimensions when ordering things off of the internet.

 

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Another day, another cooking disaster

Today is Dominic’s (Kayla’s boyfriend) birthday. He said he would like New York Cheesecake so I’ve made cheesecake before (Jello no bake) so I say this will be easy. Ok why did I say that? It has been a freaking nightmare. I have to make some sort of sponge-cake bottom. It did not turn out like it should because 1)I beat the entire egg instead of the yolk and 2) when I poured the cheesecake layer into it bubbled up to the top. I thought at that time screw it the batter tasted fabulous and so did the spongy bottom so they should be great mixed together. I forget the pan is hot after the bottom baked and burned my fingers. It has to cook for 1:15 and then cool for 2 and then refrigerate for 6. So with 14 minutes left I go to check on it and somehow the oven has turned itself off! Like there is no heat so I turned it back on but have no clue how much longer it needs to cook. I am scheduled to work a seven am tomorrow so I do not have all night to be fighting with this. It should be really interesting to see how this turns out. The next time someone requests cheesecake I am going back to the Jello brand. The kids were shocked and thought all these years I made homemade cheesecake!

Mole moral-Stick to box food, it’s so much easier!

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Today’s cake debacle

Today Brian had Dominic help him take the cake around  the house to the basement. Now that seems simple enough, except this is the Mole house. The cake would not fit through our tiny sliding glass door. I swear it is the smallest sliding glass door ever made! When the girls were little we could barely get the Barbie jeep through it and when our deep freeze was delivered they had to take the entire door off. He then measured the cake and the doors in the house. The cake would have fit through the front door but not the door down to the basement. It also won’t fit through the door to Emily’s room. So it can’t go in there either. I think I will put it in the laundry room as Brian would not agree to let it sit on his pool table. It is way too cold to be taking the sliding glass door off so he has put it in the very back of our garage where the only way I could hit it would be to plow through the recycling bin. Otherwise I would be parking in the driveway. I can hit my car, the garage, the trash cans and anything else including backing up through the grass but no way am I risking even bumping the cake. We don’t want to move it a bunch because the rocks keep falling off of it every time we move it. So until I get in touch with the artist and see if there is a way to replace some of the rocks and then use something to get it all to stay stuck I am leaving it put for a while. And with my car behind it, no way can anyone get it out of our tiny garage.

Mole moral  Nothing is ever easy and always makes for a great story!

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The adventure of picking up the cake

It’s an understatement to say nothing ever goes right with me. So the logical conclusion would be that picking up the cake was a true Mole adventure. When I called the sculpture park and the office is closed until Monday I went into full on panic mode because the auction site said they had to be picked up by the fourth. I also wanted my cake, like today. I call Meg in a panic and she said why don’t you try to find a park ranger and talk to him. She is so smart! So I jump in my car and find the ranger. Now he is in his car on his cell phone and I am standing out in the rain waiting for him to get off the phone. He finally gets out an apologizes for keeping me waiting. i said its no big deal I’m too mean to melt. When he caught my humor he started laughing. So I told him I won the auction and he said let’s go see if anyone from maintenance is still here and we can talk to them and I will show you the back entrance to the park. I showed the maintenance guy my papers and he was fine with me coming back with my husband. So I found the back parking lot which was right next to the cake. Most people parked over on the other side and had quite a walk. So my husband and I turn the cake over to remove the sandbags and guess what? My cake does not have a secret hatch or sandbags. So we removed the concrete blocks that were inside and put it safely in the truck. When we got home we were moving it into the front yard to hose it off when it slipped out of my hands and went skimming down my leg and to the ground. Now my husband saved the day by not just letting him (the cake) fall. The cake was fine, my leg not so much. (His back is now hurting because of not letting the cake fall to the ground.)  My leg doesn’t hurt too bad right now but by tomorrow it should be a hot bruised mess. I had on a brand new pair of jeans and luckily it did not rip a hole in them. My cake has metal around the bottom which is what nailed my leg. So my cake is safely home and he is in the garage till he dries and then will be safely in the basement. My husband is acting about the cake like he does our dog. He can’t stand the thing when I actually I think he finds it really cool.

Yes i am referring to my cake as a boy. Most of the cakes I would consider to be girls but I think the sculpture park was one of the most boy cakes around. And my husband who “thinks the thing is stupid” has already looked at my picture from the spring to see how the top looked and what is missing. He is also figuring out what was used to glue the wood to the top. The cake could use some fixing, I am hoping at some point to meet the artist Nick Lang and see what he suggests.

Mole moral: We own the coolest cake ever!!!

 

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